Its ur birthday today, your turning 17. We haven’t spoken in weeks. I think about u all the time, and I know u think about me too. We used to basically live together, when i stayed at ur house we used to skweez on ur little tiny matrice and i always ended up on the floor by the morning. We used to have showers together, choke each other with hugs when ever we saw eathother. I loved you… but ever since we went on the holiday to Australia our friendship was never the same. After spending every single second with you non stop for 3 weeks I got to know who you truly were, I got to see all your true colors.

I knew you from the beginning of year 7, you were in my class. i actually remember the first thing i ever said to you, we were given an assignment in misses foxes class, it was to draw a story “or something like that” at the time i didn’t know you were the most amazing drawer so I said to your face “give me the pencil” and you replied with “why do you get to draw”, and then i replied with full confidence “you do realize I’m dyslexic, which means I’m really, really creative and good at drawing” “better than you at drawing”. She used to always brings that little story up. We used to piss our selfs laughing about it.

I miss those days, I really do, but I think we became too close, I think we became addicted to each other actually. We phisacly couldn’t go one day without seeing each other or else we would go made, I would become depressed and feel so alone. I used to non stop thing about you. When I wasn’t around you I used to get agitated and fidgety but when I was with you I was calm and wholesome. I used to have a lot of friends, I was the type of person who was friends with everyone when i walked through the halls of the school I used to stop every second person and talk to them. I used to actually get invited to things, and “actually” enjoy them”. But ever since we became close I began to lose all of that. I put all my work and energy into you. You began to become a chaw…”you know what i mean, for example, it’s like a job that u HATE but u still get up everyone moring to do, because you have you, because that what u have to do, to get through the say.”

Back to this trip to Australia, we had been planning it for months and months, I remember counting down from 92 days prior. We planned to go see ur family because u hadn’t seen them in quite a long time. Your mum promised us so many amazing things that we would do once we arrived. she promised us road trips, adventures, boat trips to islands, fishing, me and you were going to get matching tattoos, we were going to go to water world… but not a single of these things happened. It was paradise but you made it hell